Mulletacular

Sometimes you encounter something in the wild. Something so spectacular that you must tell everyone in order to make them jealous, if only for a second. I was in an amusement park called Dorney Park near Allentown, PA. I was waiting for someone in my party to finish in the bathroom when the most divine example of Humanicus Mulletificus strided by me. I had thought they were extinct this far north content to graze in more fertile southern pastures, but here he was, a male of the species preening around the park with an infant who was still a ways off from mulletdom. I creeped slowly towards him, careful not to spook or startle the specimen.

His hair was perfectly manicured. The top of his head groomed with meticulous care. He was obviously proud of his mane. And let me tell you, it could only be described as a mane. It flowed over his shoulders down the front of his torso reaching all the way down to his belly button. I'm guessing he was royalty of some kind, the alpha male. He certainly could turn away all mullet challengers. It wouldn't even be close. I'm sure he enjoyed the finest female from his herd. No doubt.

It tried to get a picture of this magnificent beast, but he proved elusive. This blurry shot was all I could muster before he disappeared into the brush.